Rapsody feat. Wale - "Dark Knights"
Rapsody is one of the illest female MCs you'll find. Reminds me a bit of Jean Grae. E. Jones, part of 9th Wonder's production team, blessed her with this beat and it's dope as hell. Love the sample that loops throughout. Then there's Wale's verse to close out the track. Wale has so many slick lines in the verse. "You n-ggas lack seasoning like a torn ACL" Too dope.
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Sunday, July 7, 2013
Lyrical Goofs In Hip-Hop History
Lyrical Goofs in Hip-Hop History
Hip-Hop music has been a part of my life for over 20 years. I love the genre and can’t imagine myself ever not listening to hip-hop music. There have been so many memorable verses and lines over the years, moments where you go, “Oh shit!” and hit the rewind button to hear that punchline again. But as with anything, there’s always some moments that make you shake your head and think, “Did someone really allow that on the final edit?” Seriously, no one listened to that line or misspelling and told the rapper to rerecord it? Which got me thinking about some of the worst/inaccurate lines in hip-hop history. Then I got to research a little more and found some gems that I didn’t know existed mostly because the rapper who said such line I couldn’t give two shits about. So here you go, some of the worst rhymes ever spit on the mic. Enjoy!
Chingy – “Balla Baby”
“Black, white, Puerto Rican or Haitian/Like Japanese, Chinese or even Asian”
Chingy sucks, so I never actually heard this line and I really don’t need to. But how dumb can you be to think Japanese and Chinese people are somehow different from Asians? It’s like saying New Yorkers, Canadians or even North Americans.
Greg Nice – “Funky For You”
“Dizzy Gillespie plays a sax”
Trumpet, sax, what’s the difference? I love Greg Nice, but that’s just stupid.
Warren G – “What’s Next?”
Warren G made this list twice with two misspellings from the same damn song. Seriously, how is this possible?
“The W-A-Double R-E-and to the R”
So Warren G just spelled his own name wrong. He is now to be called Warrer G.
“What’s next, what’s next, what’s N-X-E-T?”
Um, what? You gotta stop this shit from making its way onto record.
Run – “King of Rock”
“There’s three of us, but we’re not the Beatles”
Run is a legend. Run-DMC made some of the most influential hip-hop records of all time. But you can’t get this wrong. The Beatles were known as the Fab Four. Again, who let this lyric slide?
Jay-Z – “It’s Hot”
“.38 revolve like the Sun around the Earth”
Jay is one of the greatest MCs to ever do it. He is in my Top 5 all time. Hov has had some of the most quotable lyrics in the history of hip-hop. But the Sun has never and will never revolve around the Earth. He tried to make a slick rhyme and came out sounding ignorant.
Ol’ Dirty Bastard – “Shimmy Shimmy Ya”
“For any MC in any 52 states”
In Dirty’s defense, there’s no way of us ever knowing what he was on when he wrote his lyrics. In fact “Shimmy Shimmy Ya” is full of nonsensical babble. But 52 states, really?
Boo – “Cross The Border”
“We play down in C-A-C-U-N”
A song about smuggling drugs across the border and it is one of my favorites. But c’mon, Cacun? Where is that exactly?
Master P – “Do You Know”
“If you don’t bring my muthafuckin’ money or my muthafuckin’ dope/You can forget Christmas, n-gga, ‘cause you ain’t even gon’ see New Years”
Another priceless lyric that I have never heard because Master P is just awful, but this shit is hilarious. To threaten someone that they won’t make it to Christmas because you’re going to end them before they get to New Years is just, I don’t even have words.
Foxy Brown – “Affirmative Action”
“32 grams raw, chop it in half, get 16/Double it times three/We got 48, which mean a whole lot of cream/Divide the profit by four, subtract it by eight/We back to 16”
Follow Foxy’s math and you get…4. Nice try, but next time you may want to grab a calculator.
Juelz Santana – “Black Republicans”
“Rock star, flier than an ostrich”
If only ostrichs could fly. Poor things.
Freeway – “Best @ It”
“We from two different cities, Minnesota and Philly”
Freeway must’ve learned geography at the same school as Chingy.
Lil’ Fame – “1/2 & 1/2”
“First Family will gradually lift that ass up like gravity”
Gravity does not lift you up. In fact, gravity is the reason we don’t float away into the atmosphere. I hated to include that line though, because I love M.O.P.
OJ da Juiceman – “I’m Getting Money”
“Moving in a Grand Prix, same color as thunder”
Great visual from OJ, I can see thunder so vividly. Another awful rapper that I’ve never listened to and I’m more than justified with a lyric like that. Well, that and his name is OJ da Juiceman.
Noreaga – “Banned From TV”
“I drink Hennessy straight with tomato juice”
Drinking Hennessy straight would not require tomato juice. And it sounds like an awful combination.
Game – “Dreams”
“I woke up out that coma 2001/Bout the same time Dre dropped 2001”
Game loves to name drop and he loved him some Dr. Dre when The Documentary came out, but 2001 was released in 1999.
Kanye West – “Two Words”
“I live by two words, fuck you, pay me”
Two words, four words, who’s counting?
Kanye West – “Black Skinhead”
“I keep it 300, like the Romans”
I hated this line when I first heard it. Thought it was a cheap way to rhyme Trojan and Roman and was just lazy. Then I realized how dumb the lyric really is. Keep it 300 like the Romans? Kanye is referencing the movie 300, right? Well the warriors in that movie were Spartans, from Sparta, which is in Greece. Move over Chingy and Freeway, Kanye is joining your geography class.
Young Buck – “Bang Bang”
“Just think if I ain’t empty the clip and he killed me/Would I still be living?”
I can answer this lyric in one word…no.
Redman – “5 Boroughs”
“My paragraph alone is worth 5 Mics/A 12-song LP, that’s 36 mics”
If Red meant 5 mics per song, then it would be 60 mics. If he meant per paragraph per 12-song LP then that’s over 100 easily. Red and Foxy must’ve gone to the same math class together.
Lloyd Banks – “Ain’t No Click”
“And I’ll be damned if a I co-sign an old snitch/That was gangbanging when Jaws was a goldfish”
Great White Sharks are never goldfish. I understand Banks wanted to be clever, but no. This reminds me of another terrible Banks line which isn’t inaccurate per se, but it is really dumb, “I take care of birds like an animal doctor.” Ugh.
Ja Rule – “Loose Change”
“50 Cent you gon’ get shot again by the M-U-R-E-D-R Inc.”
I hated Murda Inc. Irv, Ja, Ashanti, Lloyd, they all suck. But how the hell can you threaten someone and then misspell the name of your crew?
Kanye West – “Gettin’ It In”
“Don’t try to treat me like I ain’t famous/My apologies, are you into astrology?/Cause I’m, I’m tryin’ to make it to Uranus”
Hey look, Kanye’s back. ‘Ye says astrology, I say astronomy, what’s the difference?
Lil Wayne – “A Milli”
“I’m a venereal disease like a menstrual bleed”
Sorry ladies, but it looks like Wayne has just uncovered a breakthrough. You all experience menstrual cycles, so you all have venereal diseases. Sorry for the shit news.
And we’re out…
Hip-Hop music has been a part of my life for over 20 years. I love the genre and can’t imagine myself ever not listening to hip-hop music. There have been so many memorable verses and lines over the years, moments where you go, “Oh shit!” and hit the rewind button to hear that punchline again. But as with anything, there’s always some moments that make you shake your head and think, “Did someone really allow that on the final edit?” Seriously, no one listened to that line or misspelling and told the rapper to rerecord it? Which got me thinking about some of the worst/inaccurate lines in hip-hop history. Then I got to research a little more and found some gems that I didn’t know existed mostly because the rapper who said such line I couldn’t give two shits about. So here you go, some of the worst rhymes ever spit on the mic. Enjoy!
Chingy – “Balla Baby”
“Black, white, Puerto Rican or Haitian/Like Japanese, Chinese or even Asian”
Chingy sucks, so I never actually heard this line and I really don’t need to. But how dumb can you be to think Japanese and Chinese people are somehow different from Asians? It’s like saying New Yorkers, Canadians or even North Americans.
Greg Nice – “Funky For You”
“Dizzy Gillespie plays a sax”
Trumpet, sax, what’s the difference? I love Greg Nice, but that’s just stupid.
Warren G – “What’s Next?”
Warren G made this list twice with two misspellings from the same damn song. Seriously, how is this possible?
“The W-A-Double R-E-and to the R”
So Warren G just spelled his own name wrong. He is now to be called Warrer G.
“What’s next, what’s next, what’s N-X-E-T?”
Um, what? You gotta stop this shit from making its way onto record.
Run – “King of Rock”
“There’s three of us, but we’re not the Beatles”
Run is a legend. Run-DMC made some of the most influential hip-hop records of all time. But you can’t get this wrong. The Beatles were known as the Fab Four. Again, who let this lyric slide?
Jay-Z – “It’s Hot”
“.38 revolve like the Sun around the Earth”
Jay is one of the greatest MCs to ever do it. He is in my Top 5 all time. Hov has had some of the most quotable lyrics in the history of hip-hop. But the Sun has never and will never revolve around the Earth. He tried to make a slick rhyme and came out sounding ignorant.
Ol’ Dirty Bastard – “Shimmy Shimmy Ya”
“For any MC in any 52 states”
In Dirty’s defense, there’s no way of us ever knowing what he was on when he wrote his lyrics. In fact “Shimmy Shimmy Ya” is full of nonsensical babble. But 52 states, really?
Boo – “Cross The Border”
“We play down in C-A-C-U-N”
A song about smuggling drugs across the border and it is one of my favorites. But c’mon, Cacun? Where is that exactly?
Master P – “Do You Know”
“If you don’t bring my muthafuckin’ money or my muthafuckin’ dope/You can forget Christmas, n-gga, ‘cause you ain’t even gon’ see New Years”
Another priceless lyric that I have never heard because Master P is just awful, but this shit is hilarious. To threaten someone that they won’t make it to Christmas because you’re going to end them before they get to New Years is just, I don’t even have words.
Foxy Brown – “Affirmative Action”
“32 grams raw, chop it in half, get 16/Double it times three/We got 48, which mean a whole lot of cream/Divide the profit by four, subtract it by eight/We back to 16”
Follow Foxy’s math and you get…4. Nice try, but next time you may want to grab a calculator.
Juelz Santana – “Black Republicans”
“Rock star, flier than an ostrich”
If only ostrichs could fly. Poor things.
Freeway – “Best @ It”
“We from two different cities, Minnesota and Philly”
Freeway must’ve learned geography at the same school as Chingy.
Lil’ Fame – “1/2 & 1/2”
“First Family will gradually lift that ass up like gravity”
Gravity does not lift you up. In fact, gravity is the reason we don’t float away into the atmosphere. I hated to include that line though, because I love M.O.P.
OJ da Juiceman – “I’m Getting Money”
“Moving in a Grand Prix, same color as thunder”
Great visual from OJ, I can see thunder so vividly. Another awful rapper that I’ve never listened to and I’m more than justified with a lyric like that. Well, that and his name is OJ da Juiceman.
Noreaga – “Banned From TV”
“I drink Hennessy straight with tomato juice”
Drinking Hennessy straight would not require tomato juice. And it sounds like an awful combination.
Game – “Dreams”
“I woke up out that coma 2001/Bout the same time Dre dropped 2001”
Game loves to name drop and he loved him some Dr. Dre when The Documentary came out, but 2001 was released in 1999.
Kanye West – “Two Words”
“I live by two words, fuck you, pay me”
Two words, four words, who’s counting?
Kanye West – “Black Skinhead”
“I keep it 300, like the Romans”
I hated this line when I first heard it. Thought it was a cheap way to rhyme Trojan and Roman and was just lazy. Then I realized how dumb the lyric really is. Keep it 300 like the Romans? Kanye is referencing the movie 300, right? Well the warriors in that movie were Spartans, from Sparta, which is in Greece. Move over Chingy and Freeway, Kanye is joining your geography class.
Young Buck – “Bang Bang”
“Just think if I ain’t empty the clip and he killed me/Would I still be living?”
I can answer this lyric in one word…no.
Redman – “5 Boroughs”
“My paragraph alone is worth 5 Mics/A 12-song LP, that’s 36 mics”
If Red meant 5 mics per song, then it would be 60 mics. If he meant per paragraph per 12-song LP then that’s over 100 easily. Red and Foxy must’ve gone to the same math class together.
Lloyd Banks – “Ain’t No Click”
“And I’ll be damned if a I co-sign an old snitch/That was gangbanging when Jaws was a goldfish”
Great White Sharks are never goldfish. I understand Banks wanted to be clever, but no. This reminds me of another terrible Banks line which isn’t inaccurate per se, but it is really dumb, “I take care of birds like an animal doctor.” Ugh.
Ja Rule – “Loose Change”
“50 Cent you gon’ get shot again by the M-U-R-E-D-R Inc.”
I hated Murda Inc. Irv, Ja, Ashanti, Lloyd, they all suck. But how the hell can you threaten someone and then misspell the name of your crew?
Kanye West – “Gettin’ It In”
“Don’t try to treat me like I ain’t famous/My apologies, are you into astrology?/Cause I’m, I’m tryin’ to make it to Uranus”
Hey look, Kanye’s back. ‘Ye says astrology, I say astronomy, what’s the difference?
Lil Wayne – “A Milli”
“I’m a venereal disease like a menstrual bleed”
Sorry ladies, but it looks like Wayne has just uncovered a breakthrough. You all experience menstrual cycles, so you all have venereal diseases. Sorry for the shit news.
And we’re out…
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